They had been friends for years. Their friendship went deep. It went all the way back to childhood school days. They did all of the “things” together. But that isn’t what this story is about.
It’s about friends that stay friends through every season of life.
Friends Through All Seasons Of Life: The Good, The Bad, The Ugly And Illness
You see, they had been through a lot together. Life changes. College stupidness. Friends getting divorces. Losing grandparents. All of the hard things of life.
They had also been through the good stuff together. Weddings. Marriages. Kids. Celebrating each other through the awards and recognitions. There was never one stitch of competition. There was no need. They loved each other unconditionally. They knew what they could bring to the table and they knew what the other was good at too. There was never a need for competition.
As they went through life together, life got in the way. They didn’t talk to each other as much. Text messaging was their main form of communication. Mom life can be brutal. Unless you want everyone to hear you yell while on the phone, you stick to texting. Taking care of kids and having a phone conversation is almost pointless. Mamas do you feel me? The visits ceased. But, that is okay. Both of them knew the other was there, always.
One friend became ill and underwent several surgeries to try and “fix” a health problem. But none were completely successful. She felt alone. She was tired and felt as if no one understood. Not even her old friend.
She pulled away from everyone. She was living in a world of feeling sorry for herself.
Her old friend didn’t know how to deal with her friend’s illness. She didn’t know what to say or do. She felt helpless.
Both weren’t wrong, but the lack of communication sent both of them into a sadness unlike no other. They felt as if someone had died. The other wasn’t there anymore. Yeah they both tried texting here-and-there, but something was missing. Life all of a sudden got hard. The friendship was taking a turn or so they thought.
Their friendship could be any one of our friendships. Life happens and gets in the way some days. Don’t give up on the other. Sometimes we just need time to process and just “be”. Other days, we just need a break. And sometimes we just need to be alone. And that is okay. Everyone deals with emotions, life, hardships and illnesses in different ways. And that is okay. Be patient with the other.
Let Others Process It
If you have a chronic illness please know, not everyone knows how to deal with your illness. Everyone deals with it in their own way. Even though you are the one going through the illness itself, it affects all of your loved ones. Let them process it. Don’t take it personally if they pull away for a bit. I know it hurts, but hang on. The true friends will come back.
You Don’t Have To Say Anything
If you are a loved one of someone who has an illness, don’t feel as if you always have to talk about the illness. Don’t feel you always have to say something. No one is expecting you to have the right thing to say always. They know you don’t understand. Have compassion. Honor their feelings and sympathize with them. Listen, be there for them and love them.
Life is messy and we all deal with it in different ways. Differences are what brings friends together in the first place.
By the way, the friends are back together and have not skipped a beat. They are back to sending one another dirty memes and bad mom jokes. It’s like they never were apart.
Friends don’t have to understand what the other is going through, they just need to be there. Give them space when needed, but never stop loving the other. Good friends are hard to come by. Hold them close and don’t let them go!
Until next time…
Copyright: savageultralight / 123RF Stock Photo